Posted in Life

It is ok not to be ok.

Some days I have to remind myself that it is ok not to be ok. You see living with Adult ADD is a daily struggle. Many days my medicine and my routine keep me balanced, but since the start of the summer when I am suppose to be relaxing, I find my mind bothered by the stillness. See change doesn’t mesh well with me, I thrive off routine.

That is the way my brain is programmed, idle hands are the devils workshop. I am reminded to just be, but Lord knows I struggle with that everyday. I do my best to read, crochet, even do word puzzles, but sometimes that is not enough for my mind and it forces me to keep up and do something constructive.

So far, I have cleaned the house from top to bottom, laundry, and even purged the house of a bunch of junk that we don’t need anymore from our numerous moves, but yet still the brain goes ok what is next….

Lately, I have thought about going back to writing. Maybe just to play around and see if I still have the drive, the desire. I started 2 stories before I walked away. One was Jean Stone Book 3 (Lots of truth in this one) and another was a romantic love story based loosely off my husband and I’s relationship.

Here lately I have had some people talk about Jean Stone and “how they love the story”. “I just finished the book, is there another one.”

As I reminder Book 2 should be out this fall sometime. Fingers Crossed

For now, I gonna sit and stare at these two notebooks before me. Should I open them and continue what I started or no. Hmmm, guess you will need to wait and see……

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Posted in Uncategorized

Reflection

Today is the last month of the school year, 21 days left . My second year of teaching is about to come to a close. While I am happy to spend more time with my little one, I am going to miss these kids that I have grown to love and teach.

This year has been crazier than my 1st year of teaching, but most of it was due to personal reasons. This year has taught me strength, perseverance, and relying on my faith to see me through. While my teacher evaluation came back with high scores, I do not feel like I was able to be my best at all times. I know most teachers have to feel that way, but I plan on major reflection this summer as well as beginning my Master’s degree. My area of study is something that I struggle with…ESL/ELL. This was my first year to work with this demographic, while it can be a struggle, it comes with many rewards. Through trials and tribulations, I made it through this year and gained some knowledge along the way. After much thought, I have decided to sign on and stay at this school next year. I am ready to set my roots and expand my career. My students need a routine, a safe place they can return when things get to rough. I still haven’t forgiven myself for leaving my students last year.

April saw not only me gaining another year of age, but another year of marriage. I am truly blessed to spend another year with my best friend and husband. This time last year, I wasn’t sure we would ever see 15 years, but God gave us another chance to work together as one and for that I am truly grateful.

For now, I prep my students for the dreaded STAAR and work on finishing up the year.

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Posted in Life

Just Be

For weeks I have lived in the peace in the moment of my decision, but I find myself wondering why all this to get here. I mean do not get me wrong, the man upstairs knows what he is doing, but did I really need to go through all this to finally find myself and my purpose.

I am not a in the moment tattoo getter person, but when I signed the contract for my 1st book I wanted to document the momentous occasion by having my logo tattooed on me so that I would always remember. Fast forward to now and I was disappointed in myself. Everyday I was seeing this tattoo stare back at me as a reminder of my failure, or what I was perceiving.

I told my husband just the other day of all my tattoos, I regret this one and want to get it covered up ASAP. He said “There is nothing to be ashamed of, it is to celebrate your accomplishment.” Right, to me sadly, my book has been nothing, but a failure. Many people have told me that they loved it, but it was crushed in the writing world as being subpar, career ending, a travesty. Don’t get me wrong, I have thick skin, but geez. Maybe a little constructive criticism would be nice.

For weeks I having been doing my devotions daily, trying to listen to God for my purpose and where I am suppose to be. Am I listening? Did I miss the call? Am I on hold? Can you hear me? The last time he spoke, I heard loud and clear like a principal using a microphone for a crowd. Finally, I stopped stressing and let God know I am here waiting and ready to listen.

To my surprise, this morning while I was in the shower it hit me. It was THERE all along my purpose, I was just looking at it the wrong way. Looking down at my wrist what I first saw was Jean Stone, but when I really looked to see, it was me. The magnify glass shows an apple, my calling as a teacher. Finally, I truly see and feel my calling as a teacher, not that I didn’t before, but deciding to surrender to what God has in store for me is wonderful and nerve wracking all at the same time.

At the end of this month, I start my Master’s. Although this is gonna be the hardest thing I have ever done, it will be rewarding in the end to better myself for my students. For now, I go back to packing as I prepare to head to Vegas this weekend to celebrate my 36th Birthday and my 15th Wedding Anniversary. Hey who says I can’t take a break?

Posted in Life

Support Tribe

One day after the release of Jean Stone, I am reflecting on where I started and where I am at now.

A year ago, I was struggling with a broken marriage, tackling my first year as a teacher, and a loss of self. To put it plainly, I was uphappy. For 13 years, I was a Navy wife and now I was lost adrift at sea in my own mind.

Today I am a published author. Wow I guess I have to get use to saying that. My writing is a way to escape the world and do what I love. I have no intention of quitting teaching anytime soon as my students need me and I need them. They are apart of me and I am not ready to give that up just yet.

The last 24 hours have been a dream and I am soaking up the moment. The well-wishers, the support, and the congratulations. Do not worry, Book 2 is already done and in storyboarding. Jean Stone is going to be around for while. She has a lot of stories to tell and share. Last night I got to share it with my dad and my step mom. While the last year hasn’t been the greatest, those who love and support me have been there to listen to my whining, complaining, and be a shoulder for me when I didn’t think I could go any further.

It is thanks to my support tribe this has been possible, from Jordan my publisher, to Stephanie my beta reader, to Donna my mentor, and my family and friends. It is because of my tribe here were our rankings this morning:

My husband has been the rock in all this. Our marriage was falling apart and yet he stood by me through it all. Today I am happy to say things are better and we are rebuilding what is broken a day at a time. He is proud of all my hard work as well as my daughter who I think is sometimes most excited than I am through it all. She herself is an aspired writer working hard at her skill. The next installment of her dragon story should be out soon.

In interviews, I am always asked about advice for writing. Now I say two things:

Write for yourself and nobody else.

Find your support tribe to be there for you.

Now I am headed back to folding laundry, cleaning the house, and snuggling with my dog before the party. See even though I am a published author, my first jobs are mom and wife.

Did I mention I was in my hometown newspaper yesterday too??? Go check it out!

http://theparisnews.com/free/article_e35db9ca-36c3-11e9-860a-7324b54d5bb3.html

 

Posted in Life

Questions????????

Hey Morgan, how do you do it all writing and teaching? Aren’t you excited? Do you have it all figured out now? How many books are you writing?

Well, I don’t.

Yes I am.

Not even close.

As many as the good Lord allows me to write.

As I go through this process of publication, I have to admit I had no idea all that was involved in getting my book to the world. I know a little bit more, but I am no where near being a professional at this endeavor. All I know is that I enjoy writing and blessed to be published. My goal is to publish two books a year, one from Jean Stone and one from the YA series I work on as well. Currently, my first job is to be a teacher which I love and enjoy at least most of the time. While we all have dreams to be famous, to know I am leaving a legacy for my daughter to show to her children one day is enough for me, although I won’t say no to a movie deal.

So far, publication has exceeded my expectations. Here I am an unknown working from the ground up to build a series that I am proud of and hope to be on book shelves across the world. I have met some AMAZING people along this journey and made a few mistakes, but all in all I am happy with the way things are going the first time around. Now Book 2, I won’t be so scared about the unknown and be confident in my skills as a writer and an author.

“Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.” Since the first day I ever watched Shawshank Redemption, that quote has play a key role in my life. Coupled with my faith, I have a good feeling about the future. Although there will be bumps, breakdowns , twists, and turns, I am excited for the future in publication. Jean Stone will someday be a household name seen in the pages of a book and maybe the pictures of the silver screen. For now, I bask in the glow of my first release on Friday knowing the wheels are turning and God only knows where I will be lead.

Posted in Life

Happy Balance

brown book page
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Today I find myself home sick with sinus issues. Weird Texas weather can not make up its mind if it wants to be winter or spring. Doesn’t help I teach either. My kids love to bring me a host of viruses just waiting for their opportunity to battle my immune system.

Last Sunday I wrote a post about plans. We all know the road to hell is paved with good intentions, but I have been doing my best to pray and listen to God about what HIS plans are for me.

Being a teacher isn’t the easiest gig in the world. Yes we get off holidays and summers, but with all the testing that is required by the states, constant funding worries, and the collapse of the education system as a whole, has most of us teachers stressed to the max. Constant training, mounds of paperwork, and worrying about our students has many teachers leaving the profession in large numbers since teaching the students is no longer the main concern, it is how to we get these kids to pass the test! But it can not be that simple, well it is sadly. All students in the state of Texas must pass 5 STAAR test to graduate, 2 English, 1 Math, 1 Science, and 1 History. Every child takes the same test REGARDLESS of their needs although we are told that we must differentiate our instruction. This year for me has been especially difficult as I teach ESL. My poor students basically set up to fail, it breaks my heart. I am only in my 2nd year of teaching and my heart wonders if I am in the right place. For that I continue to pray, as I need to have a good home life and work balance. Like the saying goes, if momma ain’t happy, nobody happy.

Back to the plans. I have prayed everyday and asked others to pray for me that I would hear God and know what to do. Well wouldn’t you know it, while in church Sunday listening to the Youth Pastor talk about needing volunteers to teach the students, he spoke to me. That is where you need to be Morgan. At first I questioned it, like really?? Me?? This isn’t my forte, I barely remember any of the stories…. Ok God, I hear ya. So after church, I gave the youth minister my phone number and said I am here to help. I may not know what I am doing, but I know God won’t leave me behind.

As for my writing, well it is at a stale mate for now. With the book release in a few weeks and needing to storyboard edit Book 2, I have too much on my plate and on my mind to write well.

For now I continue to listen and follow HIS plans.

 

Posted in Life

A kid at Christmas

As a little girl, I looked forward to having my name in the paper or mentioned on the radio. I thought I was cool with my mother cutting out my name for the AB honor roll or being in a local community play.

Today, I was in the local paper for my book party. Like a kid at Christmas, I tore through the paper locating it and grinning from ear to ear. There before me was an article about Jean Stone. This book means more to me that anyone will ever know. It is me, it is my life, it is my story wrapped up in mystery.

So I ran out and bought 3 copies and I will frame one on the wall next to my two other proud achievements, my Bachelor’s degree from Texas A&M University Corpus Christi & my precious family.

 

https://www.yourconroenews.com/neighborhood/moco/news/article/Area-Event-Briefs-Houston-Area-Oil-Painters-of-13567365.php#photo-16838293