The last two weeks of my life have probably been the most peaceful I have had in almost a year. The mind is quiet, no worries, no bothers, just living and enjoying my life. Crocheting, reading, snuggling with my pets, and being present with my family.
People have asked me…”When you coming back?” Honestly, I do not know. I have been able to be present with my daughter, love on my gracious husband, and spend a lot of time deep in mediation with the Good lord and his word continuing to grow my faith.
The truth is that I like just being a teacher, a mom, and a wife. My needs and dreams have changed after the last year and I know longer feel empty and alone. While I enjoyed writing to help me escape my life, I am not trying to escape now, but embrace this life the Lord has given me. Yesterday my cousin posted something on Facebook and it resonated with me.
What if you are meant to be rescued from your current situation, but rather revived through it? Psalm 71:20
My writing was meant to be an escape from the life I thought was so broken, but God has shown me that I was where I needed to be all along. That I needed to take off the dark colored glasses, see all the wonderful things that I had right in front of me that I was missing. My family, my work, my faith. I was broken, but I am not anymore and for now I am making up for lost time from the darkness.
I am even going back to finally finish my Master’s degree. Although I am nervous, I am excited for this wonderful opportunity to advance my career and earn a higher degree.
The last year has taught me a lot about loss, humility, and sadness, but I refer back to it as my rebirth. I fell, but I am getting back up and learning to forgive myself one day at a time.